Communicating in a LDR....

Communication is everything in a long distance relationship, or in a any relationship but especially in an LDR! It is really all you have because you can't physically be together. So, here I am listing my top five communication!


1.) Texting
     Now I am sure 99% of us do this on a daily basis anyway but this is a key factor when you guys can't always be on the phone! But, you can't just have the one word conversations. "hi" "hey" "sup?" "nm" "same" "cool" "yup" Those conversations are not acceptable! Talk about anything...what you ate for lunch, whatever you did that day. Just something that you can keep talking about.

2.) Phone Calls
     For me the phone calls always happen at the end of the day. The time when we both had just gotten in bed and wanted to be all cuddly and cutesy. Find a time of day that you both can be on the phone and not have any interruptions. These are great times to feel close to each other and just enjoy each others company, as that can be hard when you are miles and miles apart.

3.) Video Calls/Chat
     Video calls are extremely important. This is the time in which you get to see how the person reacts to certain things. What they smile at and what makes them cry. You get to learn so much more about them when you get to see what they do not just hear them. I love going to bed on video with my boyfriend. It is extremely relaxing and you get to again watch their movements and how they sleep. It is very intimate.

4.) Pictures
     This may seem like an odd one. Seriously, how in the world can pictures count as communication. Well, this is a quick and easy way to share what you are doing with your partner. All you ave to do is grab out your phone, snap a picture and send it. It takes less than a minute to do and it can make your partners day.

5.) Letters and Boxes
     Now this may seem a bit old fashioned but this can be a huge romantic gesture. When I get something from my boyfriend I get extremely excited. Even if it is just a letter because it shows he was thinking about me. It is also an amazing way to spice up communication in a long distance relationship.

I hope this helped you if you are in a similar situation. xoxo- Bethany

Forgiveness vs. Forgetting

Forgiveness can be the easiest thing in the world if you love someone. But how can you forget? How do you forget about the pain? Does it take time? Work? Money? Or is it just something different for everyone?

Forgetting can be almost impossible in a long distance relationship more than any other relationship because the trust between two people in a ldr are stronger than most other relationships. This is because it is what that relationship is based upon. Most couples who are physically together don't have trust the person as much, they also don't need to communicate as much because the show it physically.

So how do you get over something like lies, cheating or any thing of that sort in a a long distance relationship? It isn't easy at all, harder then most "regular" relationships but it is possible! You really just have to not worry only about your self but you have to make a serious effort to listen to what the other person is saying. Whether they did wrong or if you did the wrong, you still need to be equally important to each other.

For me this was an issue and still is. I always thought that I was being an understanding person but I wasn't. I realized that I have a problem translating what my boyfriend was saying into something that would hurt me more. I am slowly findng that if we talk over a video chat and are able to see each other we calm down and actually listen to each other.

Now this might not work for you but just find a way to calm yourself down so you can actually listen. This might be ten or fifteen minutes of alone time, a comfort food or just being on the phone together without saying any words to one another. But there always is a way to do it!

So just calm down listen and eventually you will he able to move past it and forget!

     So, I haven't kept up lately I know. But I have to say that things are going pretty good. Is it possible to fall in love with someone more each day? It is hard to think about how fast things can come on go. So far, good things have stayed and most of the bad has left. The guy who A and I met through decided to make his grand exit out of our lives by saying I was well...to bluntly put it a whore. Now anyone who really knows me, knows that that is the furthest thing from what I am. I will admit yes I might have hurt him but hey he hurt me too.
     And I am not saying two wrongs make a right because they don't, it is just that in a situation involving two people can you really just blame the other person, without looking at yourself? I know I can't, I have admitted my mistakes and moved on form what he did, he can't do the same?
     But, yes I have moved on from that because I have someone who brought me back to what I really have always wanted. Love and happiness. Some people say "oh, you're nuts for falling in love so quickly, it isn't right!" or "You live so far away how can that even work?" Well, it does. It isn't easy, but when is love easy? Yes, I admit we don't have the relationship that some couple have when they are together physically, but that means we also don't have those issues. What we worry about isn't being around each other to much or missing a date because one of us is hanging out with friends. We have issues of not being able to talk during the day because of jobs, or the fact that there isn't unlimited minutes until seven. But, when we are talking together we really I guess cherish our time together. Yes, I know that sound dumb but I know at least I do.
     The distance can be excruciating at times, but I believe that if we did not have it then we would not be as close as we are now.  We would have been to caught up in the physicality of the relationship. But, this way I get to know him before jumping into that....
     Love should be emotional not physical...

New year?

     So, starting off the new year? Well, a few days into it anyway. Has not been easy, isn't it supposed to be a fresh start? Or something like that? Well, I mean it is a fresh start, but not for the better. I always thought "New Year, New You!" was supposed to be a good thing. It just seems I can't fit into the "groove" of 2012! But, just because the year changed does it really make it that different from the year before? Especially when that year was less than a week ago?
     I learned that my family doesn't truly like me, that I was never supposed to be here. Even when I am not close to my family I know that there is one person that is there for me...we will call him A. A has been in my life for about six, seven months now. People would say we are crazy for falling in love so fast and without really knowing each other.
     Well, here is the story. I had been talking with a friend that I met on one of those dumb sites that aren't really dating sites but they aren't for "Just Friends" either. Anyway, we were on the phone playing truth or dare, I was dared to text this number pretending to be some girl that A apparently had a crush on, or thought she was cute, or something! So, I did and I suppose after that was over I should have stopped texting him, but I didn't! I eventually told him who I really was, because we hit it of so greatly from the very start. I felt like I had known him for years, my whole life even, though I had never met him in my life!
     A and I talked all the time, I was always excited to get a text from him. Even though I had a thing with the guy we met through, I couldn't stop thinking about A. Once, me and his friend sort of "fell through," I guess if those are the right words, A and I started to date. That was back in September. Yes, yes, I know we had only known each other for three months, but why not take chances? Yeah, it could destroy everything, but couldn't that happen anyway? Plus, enjoy it while you have it.
    So, A and I have been dating for, wow, about four months now. That is so hard to believe. But, what can I say when you are happy you know it. Even when you are 1,195 long miles away. Wait, did I mention that. Well, yes kind of, I guess. But, yes, A and are in two totally different worlds. Yet, we still understand each other to the point of sometimes it blowing my mind. We have talked twenty hours a day before (well, minus sleeping) and we still haven't run out of things to say.
     Basically, my life is crazy. I don't fit into it. Yet, when I talk to him, everything fits. Just like it is supposed to.  That is really all I have to say for now, it is almost midnight I need to finish some work and hey maybe see if that someone wants to talk later. You should too.
                                                                     
                                                                                               XOXO